Never take things personally.

There was an incidence I read either in a book or over the internet and it really gave me some serious thoughts. There was a man, who reached out to Buddha and started swearing to him. On the other hand, Buddha didn’t say a word and listened to all of it quietly. When the man finished bad-mouthing, Buddha asked that man if you were to present me a very expensive gift and I refuse to accept it then to whom the gift will belong. The man answered to me. Buddha said, the same is the case now, whatever you have said, I didn’t accept it so it's back at you.

Most of the time we all do take things personally and what we do take personally are the negative thoughts or action about us. When someone is angry at you and says something bad, you take it personally, when someone blames you - you take it personally, when someone presses you hard so they could be right - you take it personally, when someone calls at you with no fault of yours - you take it personally. I could go on and on, the list endless. But, the underlying concern is why do we take it personally? It is probably because our EGO is hurt and we take the action of others personally and react to situations rather than to respond to it. For instance, have you ever noticed that a slight road rash can lead up to a life taking fight between strangers. It is probably because one had sweared the another and he lost his cool. On the other hand if that would not have been taken personally then all of it would have been resolved then and there without a fight. 

Taking things personally would make you more fragile because it would be easy to hit your ego. And, once the Ego is hit the person could go to any length to prove oneself right, to satisfy the ego. What I have understood from the people of the earth over past years is that if something bad is happening or someone has done anything wrong to you or something is not going by the way you have planned it, you don’t have to take it personally. If people mistreat you, step back so that there is a gap and they can’t reach you but never take it personally. If someone is backbiting about you, don’t take it personally, just be cool about it and chop up the communication - only to required levels.

I know it is bookish and really hard not to think about things that have a direct impact as if they hit the gut and you are on the ground. It requires a lot and a lot of practice not to take things personally and to respond rather than to react. Always remember, if something has hit you personally then it didn't hit you, it hit your EGO, and it is a negative value and you don't react to a negative value. For instance, would you take it personally if I blame you for why you are not an orange and I expect you to be one? You won’t take it personally instead would chuckle on it. But, I were to blame you are lazy, stupid, the disaster happened because of you, this didn't worked out because of you, the losses are because of you etc. you might take it personally thinking how come he/she said that to me, how am I responsible for that, how am I to blame for the fall. The only difference in being orange and stupid is your own perception toward each. We only take negative values to hit our EGO not the positive ones. It is not always easy to think good all the time when life is twirling repeatedly. Just walk away from the situation with a smile. Give yourself a breather to recover. The key to finding a response to a reactable situation is to give it time, you will definitely see the good surfacing out of it. It is just you, who has to keep repeating to see good in everything that is happening around, for you and by you. Keep on repeating every single time it happens to you. Your EGO will be so under layered and you will be healed beyond measure.